


The Spoiler and the Bat-Girl versus the Mechanical Menaces

by ciaan



Category: Batgirl (Comics), DCU
Genre: Alternate Universe - Steampunk, Chromatic Yuletide, Chromatic Yuletide 2012, Crack, Diary/Journal, F/F, Florid Victoriana, Fluff, Gen, Girls In Suits, Misses Clause Challenge, No Steam, Pre-Femslash, Robots, Yuletide Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-21
Updated: 2012-12-21
Packaged: 2017-11-21 22:36:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/602842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ciaan/pseuds/ciaan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dear Diary - Today brought many Events of which you ought to be informed. I do not even know which one to mention first! Perhaps I shall start with the one that is quickest to tell - and most socially acceptable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Spoiler and the Bat-Girl versus the Mechanical Menaces

**Author's Note:**

  * For [butterflysteve](https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterflysteve/gifts).



> Thanks to coyotegestalt and jlvsclrk for betaing.

Dear Diary -

Today brought many Events of which you ought to be informed. I do not even know which one to mention first! Perhaps I shall start with the one that is quickest to tell - and most socially acceptable.

Mister Bruce Wayne is holding a Christmas Ball at Wayne Manor and we are to attend! Doctor Leslie Thompkins is intimate with his family, and as she works with Mother at the Hospital she has extended an invitation to her, and Mother has decided that I should attend as well. She believes it will be an excellent chance for me to meet young men of good station such as Mister Wayne's many Wards and their Friends. I imagine they are all rather stuck-up and moldy. But I shall enjoy the ball nonetheless! Music, and dancing, and Wayne Manor is always quite elegantly decorated for the Holidays; it will be ever so lovely to see inside it!

The next piece of news involves my unladylike activities, so you must keep it in utmost confidence, Dear Diary. I shall tell you the story in all its gory Details.

Since last I wrote to you I heard from some quite Trustworthy - though not at all Reputable - sources that my Father is now working for the Joker. I feel this may be a positive turn of affairs in the long run, as very few of his Minions seem to come out of the situation Unscathed. However, in the shorter term which affects us most and behooves us still to deal with, it is not good, as they are building an army of clockwork men which they seek to turn loose on the Streets of Gotham for the purposes of Wreaking Havoc and Mayhem.

Tonight was the test run of the first corps of this clockwork curse.

As I was out patrolling the rooftops in order to ascertain the exact location from whence the metallic menace would be unleashed I glanced up at the sky and there, silhouetted against the city's glowing clouds, I beheld one of the smaller Bat-Dirigibles. I had hopes that it meant Robin had spotted me and was come to aid in my Endeavors. He does provide some tiny measure of help at times and though his attempts to be courteous are none too Successful it is ever so much fun to tease him and make him blush.

At that juncture I was distracted by a clanking sound coming from the street where, when I looked, I could see five of the evil automatons marching out of an otherwise nondescript warehouse. I began to hope with even greater fervor that Robin had indeed come to provide Back-Up; yet I was certain that I could take them all on myself regardless and so I leapt down to engage them in Combat. Though I was besting them in the fray overall they at one moment had me at a Disadvantage when, using their steel strength, one of them pinned my arms behind and the other actually hoisted up my ankles so that the two of them were carrying my entire weight as they strode down the boulevard. (And the skirts of my purple fighting dress were not behaving. It is a good thing I wear bloomers underneath them.)

Alas for these rogue robots they did not get far in this fashion. From the sky above us flew a Bat-Boomerang, knocking directly into the controls of the one who held my feet, and causing it to short out its Mechanism. It released its hold on me and collapsed into a mere pile of scrap metal. Following the Bat-Boomerang down in short order came a Dashing Figure I had never met previously. Before she even folded away the gliding wings of her cape she had alighted on the head of one soulless construction and knocked it to the ground, leaping lightly away from its falling form to deliver a swift kick to the chest of another - swifter than the first could hit the pavement.

Since she had thus rendered three of our Opponents out of commission I took my chance and managed to kick the legs out from under the one still holding my arms, struggling my way free of it. As it stood back up and reached for me again my Mysterious Sidekick ducked the blow which the other remaining patina'd pugilist threw at her, and the two mechanized militants collided with each other, releasing a Shower of Sparks and convulsing their way to Obsolescence.

You may well imagine the Scene now. The two of us stood victorious amongst the fallen remains of the five fatal figures who had sought to bring Gotham to its knees. Instead they had themselves been laid low and a dramatic Blow was struck against the pernicious plans of my ferocious Father and the ever unjust Joker. I dusted myself off and adjusted my hood for I did not want to give a bad impression to the Bat-Girl who stood before me.

She had an air of such well-earned Confidence and Mystique about her, and as I said prior, she was quite dashing indeed, dressed in a stark black tuxedo and mask with the Bat-Symbol on her swirling cloak. Her eyes were dark and held a depth of Feeling though her countenance was all Business.

I enquired whether she would inform the Bat-Man of the Joker's automated army and their Location. For answer she spoke not a word but rather gave a simple nod. Then I was ever so brave and what Mother would call forward and expressed that I would accept her help again at any point that she wished to provide it in our common concern of riding this fair City of evil. Though I realize my efforts are much more Effective than theirs the Bat-Folk do contribute in some small measure to this important Cause.

At this Declaration she smiled, an expression which looked ever so fetching curving her enviable lips, and stepped closer. She took gentle hold of my hand and raised it in a chivalrous Gesture, placing a soft kiss upon the backs of my fingers. I was quite moved by this Display and - overcome by uncertainty about how to respond - did not Manage to do so before she cast a Grapple-Line and disappeared into the sky as suddenly and gracefully as she had originally appeared.

And that, Dear Diary, is the story of my first Team-Up with the Bat-Girl. I hope that I shall Soon be able to write and describe to you the circumstances of our second Adventure - or at the very least our second meeting, for I confess there is a certain Charm to the thought of having moments that allow for more social intercourse without the Interruption of evildoers. Though make no mistake, there will be evildoers and they will continue, as they have in the past, to be vanquished by the Spoiler!

Either way I shall shortly be able to tell you all about the Christmas Ball at Wayne Manor.

Until then, I remain, -

Your Friend and Author, -

Stephanie Brown


End file.
